Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.