I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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