Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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