So drunk its hurt
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
