i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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