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Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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