I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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