People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Randomize
