she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Randomize
