I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
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Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
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Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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