It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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