just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Randomize