I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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