he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
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and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
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I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Then again, he has huge mansions.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening