Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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