Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
