Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize