Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
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