In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize