You can't special order awesome
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
