That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Randomize
