you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
