Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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