so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
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