I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Randomize
