I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Randomize