Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
