Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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