I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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