my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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