this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
