doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
