its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
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