remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
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