I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
It's shark week go big or go home
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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