I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
