i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
