Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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