We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
wow bdsm is so cute
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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