No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
