Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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