I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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