As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
