You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize