Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I don't think brook has ever known best
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Randomize
