Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
