Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
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I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
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The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
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