her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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