Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Randomize
