ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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