before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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